The Blog
Our best advice when it’s tough with kids:breathe, laugh, dance, sing, hug, call a friend. Be gentle with yourself, you’re not done growing up yet. This won’t last and you are not alone.
Teaching Kids Self-Compassion
Does your child ever judge herself harshly? Maybe you’ve seen your child make a mistake–like forget her homework, break something accidentally, or oversleep–and then you could tell she was mentally beating herself up for it. Maybe she even said, “I’m so stupid. I’m...
Bringing Fun Back Into Family
As I write this, I’m sitting at the dining room table with the cat on my lap, drinking some coffee. It’s raining lightly outside (Of course! It’s Oregon!). There are signs of spring everywhere. The plum tree outside the window is full of white blossoms. Yellow and...
Triggered? Recover in 30 seconds by doing this
If you’re like me, when you’re in a “good place” you just don’t get triggered easily. As humans, if we’re not stressed or tired, things just don’t bother us that much. You can probably tolerate just about anything when you’ve had a full night of sleep, eaten, and...
Next time you’re triggered, ask yourself this
Once a year I spend a weekend with a bunch of my mom friends on the coast. We talk, walk, eat, play games, sit in the hot tub, watch movies, stay up late, and sleep in. Last mom’s weekend, we started talking about things (and people) that “trigger” us. But the...
Want your child to do chores?
A few months ago we talked to KJ Dell'Antonia. KJ’s a mom of 4 and a former New York Times reporter. She’s an excellent write; she’s wise and interesting. And her recent book, How to be a Happier Parent, is a great read. KJ lives on a farm, there is a LOT of work to...
Holidays stressful for you and the kids? Get my 5 best tips!
In a few days we leave to go “home”! :) It started out feeling like a fun adventure. Now it sounds like sheer craziness… A 30-hour train ride to get to LA for Christmas, then a plane flight to Texas for New Year’s and another flight to get home. Visiting family on...
Parenting a child who is “too everything”
My kids are not always easy kids. I’m not always a great mom to them. But I’ve started to reframe things. You see, my usual way of being with my kids is that I worry, I see things I want to “work on” in them, and I try to get things done. I don’t pay attention to the...
When your child is upset, where do you focus?
What do you focus on when your child is upset or having a meltdown? Do you pay attention to your child or to yourself? Dr. Kristin Neff, autism mom and self-compassion researcher, answered this question for us… What she said–and what the research shows–might surprise...
What the Dalai Lama wants for kids
Have you ever had an argument with a spouse or partner that goes like this: The argument gets more and more heated until you start talking about feelings, and then it all changes from clenched jaws to peace and tenderness? It’s pretty amazing that when we talk about...